Conflict is a normal part of most relationships as two people will very rarely have the same views and opinions about absolutely everything. If conflict is handled properly it doesn’t need to be a major issue and can actually help to strengthen a relationship, however if it is dealt with in the wrong way it can cause great unhappiness and prove to be very destructive.
By learning skills for effective conflict resolution you will be able to build stronger bonds within your relationships; the following points provide more information.
1. Be Open to the Needs of Others
Conflict arises from difference in opinion, being open to listening to someone else’s needs and ideas shows that you have respect for their feelings, and in turn they will be more likely to listen to your point of view. When both partners value each other’s opinions and feeling they are more likely to be able to reach a compromise without resorting to arguments or ultimatums.
2. Don’t Ignore Signs of Conflict
A conflicting opinion on a subject often goes a little deeper than a simple disagreement and a similar situation is likely to arise again, especially if it involves something important to you such as your values, religion, culture or beliefs. If you try to ignore situations like this they will become worse over time and be likely to cause an explosive argument, it is a good idea to try and deal with the first signs of conflict when they appear before any tension begins to build up.
3. Try to View Conflict Positively
If you are able to successfully solve conflict within your relationship it will help you to feel more secure that it can survive challenges and stand the test of time, and also help build a sense of trust and intimacy.
Try not to perceive conflict something that has to lead to arguments and confrontation, especially if you have had difficult experiences in the past, instead view it as an opportunity to learn from each other and maintain the balance within your relationship.
4. Be Assertive
Be clear about your needs and open about how you feel. Use language that explains your point of view assertively such as ‘I feel hurt you forgot my birthday’ instead of using emotional or aggressive wording like ‘You forgot my birthday to hurt me’, by simply paying attention to how you put your message across you will sound a lot more reasonable and be a lot less likely to argue.
5. Make time to Talk
Trying to discuss important matters when other things are going on around you is never a good idea; it can generally lead to confusion and stress. Pick a good time to discuss any conflicting opinions, make sure you aren’t likely to be disturbed and that you are both able to relax and take as long as you need. Discussing problems in the right environment makes them a lot more likely to be resolved calmly.
Hopefully this article has provided you with some helpful advice and guidance to resolve any conflicts that may arise within your relationships more effectively, and shown that conflict can be a positive part of building a long lasting, trusting relationship.
More info at www.cityofeve.com